tinder tsuris

she will want to shoot me for this blog...but i can't help myself...i am the mother of a twenty-something daughter...and i am watching the trainwreck of today's "mating rituals" from the sidelines...and i want to throw up...tinder...ok cupid...plenty of fish...on and on...making the old-fashioned bar pick-ups from the seventies look sanitized and clean...although i am sure our mothers had visions of "looking for mr. goodbar" in their heads...thanks to modern technology you can have a whole relationship in one day and never meet...you can reject with a non-swipe...you can ride a roller coaster of attention and rejection and never leave home...when i was her age (wow i sound ancient) there was effort that went into rejection...first, someone had to get your phone number...either in person...or from some well-meaning relative who gave it out like halloween candy without telling you..."you'll like him, he's so nice"...which often meant he needed the trick or treat bag on his head to go in public...then there was the date...and if it was pleasant enough, maybe you went out a few times...and then the phone stopped ringing...because after the weekend date you had to wait for a phone call...or maybe you called...because now it was the eighties...but if you called too much you were suffocating them...and they said..."it's not you, it's me"..."i need some time to find myself"..."i think we want different things"...and then you cried to your friends...got drunk at happy hour...ate a few chocolate bars...and went on...then times started changing...berger broke up with carrie on a post it!...email break ups...text break ups...nothing left to break up...and now it's swipe and the city...and people don't know how to talk anymore...or talk with their eyes...and i am lamenting...people certainly can't write...there are no love letters...or cards...nothing to pull out of storage and smile over so many years later...tsuris...the flavor of the word is lost in translation...but that motherly woe is universal...just don't ever mess with our girls (or boys)...cause we'll rain a whole freakin' mess of tsuris on your parade!...tinder my ass