cause i gotta have faith...

it is that time of year again...baseball playoffs in the distance...football stats mounting...and brisket...rosh hashonah...days of awe...yom kippur...hours of atonement...they loom as summer ends...then fly by...but faith is that elusive feeling deep within...and i have to admit that i am green with envy when i see those so sure and steady in their belief...because for me it has always been much like the ocean...ebb and flow...rocky and tranquil...dark, then luminous...and so much emotion tied to memory...and family...and joyous dinners in tight places...and then to all who are gone...no longer at the table...i think ultimately, for me, my faith is not really within temple walls...although there is sweetness in prayer and peace in the silence...for me it is in the writing...and the determination to share memories...feelings...of what came before and where i wish we could be in this lifetime...and so i will grasp that this holy season...take it with me into the new year...wishing everyone reading l'shanah tovah...a sweet and happy new year...and yes, i really do want world peace...

leave it to cleaver...

september in the city...in our city...nyc...which for new yorkers is, and will always be the only city...we now live in the long and painful shadow of 9/11...and so like many people i was perplexed that last sunday the miss america organization chose that night for airing...albeit the talent competition...or lack thereof...was a welcome relief to the sadness that permeates that day every year...the baton twirler should have had flaming batons a la "miss congeniality"...yeah, that would have been fun...but what really opened my eyes was the question and answer segment...20 seconds to answer rather hard-hitting questions from celebrities (a stretch as some of them wouldn't even make the "d" list that "dancing with the stars" scrapes around)...and yet, they weren't awful in their 20 seconds...tanned, teased, taped and starving these young women made me shake my head...multi-million dollar matt lauer should have taken notes...the pretty boys on the left and barbie fox girls on the right also...november looms in the distance and we deserve better...from candidates and pundits and the media and ourselves too...and then there it was...while having dinner with friends thursday the news broke with the story of the man and his meat cleaver...and bedlam a block from penn station...my commuter hell hub as it were...but i didn't flinch this thursday... in the shadow of the lost towers i am numb...i just came up with the hope that police would be all over that hub...and i would get out of dodge...did you see that blur at the city line friday?...nah, it wasn't the road runner...it was bratton...leave it to cleaver...a farewell for bratton...from this beloved city...our big apple with insidious rotting at the core...