who says you can't go home...

let's see...my feet are killing me...parts of my body hurt that i never knew existed...i suddenly have no voice, and sound like demi moore...but with a brain...ah, yes...the 35th high school reunion was great...for those of us who have not been back to staten island, and old familiar stomping grounds, it was quite an eye-opener...driving forest avenue towards denino's (of course) we were wondering if we were even in the same borough as our faded memories...after a few hours of catching up with dear friends suzanne, anne and kathryn it was time to start getting ready...it may have been around 4:30...yes, on this side of 50 it is a process...when the taxi came to take us to the party, i was a little less than thrilled to see a van...a dress, heels, stockings (yes, again, this side of 50) and climbing do not make an attractive look...add the rain on the climb out...let the pain begin!...and then we were there...35 years later...no name tags...but it didn't matter...lots of hugs and talk...several drinks and bee gees' songs later a lot of dancing...a lot of laughter as we attempted to take pictures, read raffle ticket numbers or glance at phones before breaking down and grabbing for the reading glasses...i was thinking that at the next reunion every place setting should include a pair of them...in the requisite red and grey, of course...some notable memories...jeff's welcome toast with a too-long menopause reference in a room that was roughly 65% women with knives in front of them...the dj who at times seemed a little confused with the music of our era...but what the hell, we were game...the "after-party" at the hilton with our rounds of drinks provided by a fellow graduate who just didn't want the night to end...this while brides and bridesmaids sauntered in and out...and some monsignor farrell '78 graduates who also celebrated that night...still wearing their picture tags in vintage 70's black and white (it was at that point that I truly appreciated our lack of name tags)...when i think of the night i will always think of the warmth and genuine affection of my fellow '78 graduates...i will think of the emptiness we all felt for those no longer with us...and for the hope that more will be able to join us in 5 years...that we all will be healthy and ready to share a few hours and break bread as they say..who says you can't go home?...not me!

spring ahead...fall back...

i am the hamster on the wheel...as hard as i try to "spring ahead" it would seem the cards intend to have me "fall back"...for now...and so even as we delight in the extended warmth of almost mid-autumn...i feel the chill and seem the paralyzed poet, unable to write even the most banal of poems..."you're only as happy as your least happy child"...this filters through my remaining brain cells...that would be lauren, my only, who is suffering as we try to diagnose unremitting nausea and pain...days stretching to a week..then two...and so i am not so happy...they say timing is everything (yes, this is a blog post riddled with cliches)...starting a new job, albeit part-time, just as this crisis reared it's nasty head...sprinkle this with some manuscript and contest rejections...then the look on the clinique saleswoman's face as she tried to find a product that would cover the black circles under my eyes (this with a 35th high school reunion days away)...and there you have it...hamster on the wheel...running forward, falling back...hoping to jump, land and cut loose before the leaves fall...