into the great wide open...

the last days of july...the sun already setting a bit earlier...and as i emerge from the easy-bake oven that was the last few weeks i feel restless...trying to kickstart my creative juices...submitting a new manuscript to small poetry presses...hoping to avoid the self-publish route this time...deadlines...editing...all the while trying to keep writing...realizing i have been slacking...then forgiving myself...summer was meant for slacking...leave the angst for a biting cold january night...i am typing away next to my blogging companion...my 11-year-old tabby, donut...it's been a rough road for donut since his diagnosis of diabetes in march...he's looking a little weary and i am looking a little sleep-deprived...and yet, there he is next to me, purring away...not a care in the world...sometimes i think about driving down an endless road...the wind in my hair, the ocean to one side and pastel dunes to the other...and donut, my indoor kitty, next to me, not in a carrier...just sitting with the soft breeze all around...that little curve of a feline smile from the side...tom petty on the radio...all our worries a blur in the rear mirror...into the great wide open under them skies of blue...

ramble on....

and so as this endless heatwave plods on i find my mind skipping aimlessly...first, the heart and jason bonham experience concert about 10 days ago at jones beach...incredible show...ann and nancy wilson giving me hope that creativity does not peak before fifty..."stairway to heaven" in the rain...sublime...but like all concerts it did attract its share of weird...like before the show when we were sitting by the concession stands next to another couple...some man, stoned beyond all comprehension, asked us where the train was...the other couple tactfully told him we were just about on the water and there was no train...he said he had no car or way back so we suggested he see security...and when he walked away the couple turned to us and said "uh, how did he get here?"...then towards the end of the concert when two morons moved down behind us and proceeded to talk loudly and yell...where is that random lightning strike when you need it?...flash forward...this weekend an overnight in the city...first, a visit to the museum of modern art - for art and air-conditioning...decided to see it bottom to top...tried to have an open mind...white canvas...installation of jars...snow shovel suspended from the ceiling...woody allen was whispering in my ear, "was it heavy? did it achieve total heaviosity?"...aching for the uptown metropolitan museum of art...until the 5th floor...and there it was van gogh's "the starry night"...and all was okay with the world...later the old music box theater and "pippin"...almost 40 years since i saw the original production...and then all was glorious in the world...smiling as i sauntered into the five billion degree steambath that was times square at 11pm...navigating through the sea of humanity...and strollers...and so many languages...a warped "it's a small world" and i secretly wished for the old times square...before it was disneyfied and all...the old sordid times square in its 11pm saturday night stroller-less glory...next rooftop drinks...a warm breeze, music thumping, laughter...the guy next to us with his date, an obvious escort leaned in and above the roar i heard, "what do you think of tom cruise?"...oh, yeah...gotta love it...ramble on